Ken Osmond

If any of you are looking for Eddie Haskell . . . he's living right here in my house and looks, oddly, like a little boy we all used to call Wilson. My son's new tag line when he's in trouble and he's one step away from a spanking is:

"Mom, you look cute!"

(shoulder's shrugged, head tilted to the side, grin with tongue peaking through his teeth)

I feel like I should have a calf length dress and apron on and respond back, "no Wally & the Beave can not come out to see you. Now please leave, I have a cake baking and dishes to finish hand washing!" Who teaches them this stuff!?

Drum Roll Please

For the first time in TWO & A HALF YEARS I did not change a diaper or remove wet or soiled clothing yesterday!!!

Swinging

A Few More Wilsonisms

After the last post I have been reminded of a few more Wilson stories that I thought needed to be recorded for posterity (I have a feeling I'm still leaving some out, but I'll keep posting them as I remember them)


A few weeks ago we were meeting some friends at the Natural Science Museum. On the way there I was telling Wilson who all would be there, "Nathan's going to be there and Baby Thomas (Nathan's brother)is going to be there and Stella's going to be there with her little sister Lucy." Wilson thought about this for a second and said, "Thas a lotta kids . . . sigh . . . I need a broffer!"


When Wilson wakes up from his nap or in the morning he loves to announce this fact- "I wake up!" It's especially thrilling when he makes this announcement at 3:00 in the morning or about 10 minutes after he's been sent to his room for his nap. I'm like, "umm, you forgot to go to sleep- go try again, please." I must add that this must be an inherited trait as I myself used to announce myself each morning by proclaiming "Maggie's awake!" from my crib. It was my subtle cue to my loyal subjects to come and remove from my sleeping chamber.


When he's in trouble and is trying to avoid punishment he'll look at me with the cutest little smile you've ever seen, point at me and say, "Mamma, you're happy". And no matter how mad I really am, this really does make me happy and who can spank when you're happy. Cursed "original sin"- why does disciplining have to be so hard.


We'll call this one "nearly nude handyman". Phil was fixing our fence and gate this weekend. Wilson sat down to ponder life for a while and got lost. He had an accident. So I removed his undies and pants and then went to "hold something" for Phil while he hammered or screwed it into place. When I got back to help Wilson get dressed, I found that he had gone in and brought all of his tools outsides and was attempting to put the old gate latch back together, muttering "I help daddy- I hammer dis wight here . . ."

We think he may be getting a little influence from our Japanese neighbors. He consistently swaps "r's" for "l's" and vice versa. We actually have some friends who had their vet change their cat's name to "Loy" on his medical records because they found Loy to be a much cuter name than Roy. So now when we tell Wilson "we're going to Mr. Nate's house and we're going to see Nacho, Sam, and Loy" He says "we go to missa Nate's house and see Nacho, and Sam, and Roy." (No, no, no! Sing like this, not fa-ra-ra-ra-ra, fa-la-la-la-la- the Chinese restaurateur from A Christmas Story)

He is also constantly roaming around the house singing songs. It's hysterical, because most of the time he's purposefully making up new words to old favorites. He reminds me of the character Frances the badger in the children's books (Bedtime for Frances, Bread and Jam for Frances, and A Baby Sister for Frances)- she was one of my favorites as a child. She always made up random songs about what she was doing- and that's Wilson, just wandering around creating a little sound track of his life!

Trip to the Zoo

Monday, Jamie and I decided to take one of the last trips to the zoo before it just gets entirely too hot. We took Wilson, Nathan, Thomas, and their cousin Will. It was so much fun to watch the boys be boys. They ran, laughed, climbed, threw their sandwiches in the turtle pond, and watched birds poop. What more could you ask for?

Checking out bug specimen in a tunnel

Thoughtful observation of the flamingos

Hatching from alligator eggs and then attacking the mamma in the Mississippi exhibit

Testing out a dirt nest

The gator's secure Ma'am, you may continue with your zoological tour

Story update

It has been quite busy around here over the past few weeks. We got to see our cousin Adam over Easter & he's walking! What fun. There have been Easter egg hunts and trips to the zoo. Playdates at the park and story time at the library. A few stories from the past few months with Wilson follow (go down to the next post for a few pictures).

Wilson to Mamma while she's working at her desk: I hide da Easta eggs for you
I walk in to the yard to find that all along the horizontal piece of our fence Wilson has placed all the Easter eggs he found at his school Easter egg hunt for me to find

Mamma to Wilson at bedtime with Wilson repeating after her: Okay, here's your Bible verse, Love God . . . and love . . . each other . . . First John . . . 4:21
Wilson to Mamma: . . . Love God . . . and love each other . . . NO Mamma, it's UNCLE John- not first John . . . four tenty one

Mamma to Wilson: Wilson, do you need to poo-poo on the potty?
Wilson to Mamma: What's his name?

(a little explanation I'm sure is in order- we are about 85% on potty training and staying dry for the most part, but we are having a good bit of trouble with the, shall I say, solid waste department. So, to encourage Wilson, for any successful attempt he receives a new Cars character. Before he is even willing to try, he wants to know what the car he MIGHT receive's name is)

Wilson to Mamma: I need to tee-tee on potty. Thank u for tellin me. I so proud a u!

(apparently we're no longer for positive reinforcement or encouragement, he's available for self praise 24 hours a day)

Mamma to Wilson: Just PLEASE try your _______ (fill in the blank, veggies, meat, fruit, whatever is NOT the flavor of the week)
Wilson (touching whatever the food is to his tongue and putting it back on his plate) to Mamma: I try it, thank you, i so proud of you! You have bassert now.

Wilson (casually walking past a candy dish at his Granna's house) to himself: I tee-tee on potty (he then takes a congratulatory handful of jelly beans and shoves them in his mouth- apparently at some point that day he had made it to the potty on time and felt he was slighted by the fact that I have not rewarded that in over a month!)

Wilson to Lightning McQueen matchbox car: You in time out, you stay right here (apparently reenacting his teacher's actions to him that day in school)

. . . and my personal favorite . . .

Nice elderly lady in the grocery store to Wilson: Well aren't you just the cutest thing!?
Wilson to nice elderly lady in the grocery store: Bless your heart!

Picture Update

Our Play Group Easter Egg Hunt:

"I see one!"
Looking hard

Checking out all his eggs!
Nathan & Wilson inspecting a caterpillar that joined our egg hunt

Senior prom for my brother and his girlfriend, Jordan. BE-U-TI-FUL!

Wilson reading to his cousin, Baby Adam

Mamma, Aunt Ashley, Cousin Adam, and Wilson all bundled up and ready

for the Easter parade in Granna's neighborhood- in the freezing cold!

Easter Sunday